Alfred Nobel Jokes

After hearing that he has been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize, Putin said, 'Tell me who the other nominees are — and I will eliminate them.'

Al Gore has won an Academy award. He's won an Emmy award. And now, he's won the Nobel prize. But what he really wants is the Latin Grammy.

Alfred Nobel was a great guy. He was a scientist, engineer, and he created dynamite. He also created the Nobel Prizes.
He was so amazing that he blew everyone away.

Can conspiracy theorists win a Nobel Prize?

Answer: They already have a Theory of Everything.

Did you hear about the guy who won the Nobel for inventing time travel to the future?

Answer: He was ahead of his time.

Did You hear about the Nobel Peace Prize won by Al Gore?

Answer: In a stunning reversal, the Supreme Court awarded it to George Bush.

How come the village Guy Fawkes won the Nobel Peace Prize?

Answer: Cause he was outstanding in his field.

If Queen Elizabeth accidentally farts during dinner, the other guests are supposed to pretend like nothing happened.

Nobel gases have no reaction.

Regardless of all her great work, why has Cher never been considered for the Nobel Peace prize?

Answer: No one wants another Cher-Nobel.

What do a Nobel prize winner and an everyday farmer have in common?

Answer: Both are outstanding in their field

Why did Alexander Graham Bell never receive a nobel prize?

Answer: Because it's a "no bell" prize.

Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel Prize?

Answer: He was out standing in his field.

Why did the scientist remove the bell off the house?

Answer: Because he wanted to win the NoBell prize.

Why Marie Curie won two Nobel Prizes?

Answer: Because she was very rad.

Years ago, Nobel peace prize winner Liu Xiaobo died in custody under Xi Jinping, who denied any connection to the incident.
They said it’s a matter of “He said, Xi said.”