Get ready to ho-ho-hold onto your sides with our hilarious collection of Santa Claus jokes! Whether you're a fan, fanatic, follower or groupie of the famous bearded man in red, you'll find plenty of silly, corny and funny jokes that are sure to make you laugh. From puns and oneliners to witty quotes and clever riddles, our collection has it all. So sit back, pour yourself some eggnog and get ready to jingle all the way with our side-splitting Santa Claus jokes!
Back to MiscellaneousHow can Santa’s sleigh fly through the air?Answer: You would too if you were pulled by flying reindeer.
How do you know Santa is good at karate?Answer: Because he has a black belt!
How do you know when Santa's in the room?Answer: You can sense his presents.
How much did Santa pay for his reindeer?Answer: Nothing. They were on the house!
How much does it cost Santa to park his sleigh and reindeer?Answer: Nothing, it’s on the house!
How much does it cost to fly Santa’s sleigh?Answer: About eight bucks, nine during bad weather.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Santa
Santa who?
Santa Clause!
Rudolph had to ask Santa why Dasher and Dancer are always taking coffee breaks?
Santa: Because those two are my star bucks.
What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa when she looked up in the sky?Answer: Looks like rein, deer!
What did the ghost say to Santa Claus?Answer: I'll have a boo Christmas without you.
What do call Santa when he stops moving?Answer: Santa Pause
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?Answer: Claustrophobic
What do you call Santa when he goes down a chimney with a fire at the bottom?Answer: Krisp Cringle
What do you get if you cross Santa and a dog?Answer: Santa Paws
What do you get if you cross Santa Claus with a duck?Answer: A Christmas Quacker!
What do you get when you deep fry Santa Claus?Answer: Crisp Kringle
What does Santa call the reindeer with no eyes?Answer: I have no eyed deer.
What does Santa say in a race?Answer: Ready, set, HO!
What is big, red and flies in the sky?Answer: Santa Claus
What is Santa’s favorite band?Answer: Sled Zeppelin
What nationality is Santa Claus?Answer: North Polish.
What's red and white, red and white, red and white?Answer: Santa Claus rolling down the hill.
What's Santa's favourite candy?Answer: Jolly Ranchers!
What's white and red and goes up and down and up and down?Answer: Santa Claus in an elevator!
Where did Santa Claus go for vacation?Answer: Santa Cruz.
Which of Santa's reindeer has cleanest antlers?Answer: Comet
Why does Mrs. Claus always pray for a white Christmas?Answer: Cause she married to a guy who comes once a year.
Why does Santa always come through the chimney?Answer: Because he knows better than to try the back door.
Why does Santa have three gardens?Answer: So he can go HOE HOE HOE.
Why doesn’t Santa have kids of his own?Answer: He only comes once a year.
Why doesn’t Santa use reindeer milk in his coffee?Answer: He’s on a non-deery diet.
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